Stranded In Stereo: Monday Morning Newsletter (10/20/08)

Monday, October 20, 2008

Monday Morning Newsletter (10/20/08)

We are almost up to a full Mixtapes-worth of artists who have asked the McCain campaign not to dirty their songs with his wrinkly, formaldehyde stinking touch. This week Jon Bon Jovi demanded that Sarah Palin, to cease the use of his song “Who Says You Can’t Go Home.” Caribou Barbie had no comment.

I aired the rumor weeks ago but now we have confirmation. The Guns N’ Roses album Chinese Democracy will hit stores on Sunday, November 23rd The album will be sold exclusively in Best Buy and iTunes. Axl plans to tour with a band of hired monkeys in support of the album beginning in 2009. José predicts another 10-year delay.

It was a sad day in Motown this week. Levi Stubbs, one of the original members of The Four Tops, died this week. He was 72. Stubbs had stopped performing in 2000 due to his declining health. The Four Tops had a massive, 45 hit singles in their career. Please adjust your death pools, Abdul "Duke" Fakir, the only living original member of the Tops.

My Morning Jacket
has been forced to cancel their upcoming European tour after vocalist Jim James fell offstage last week. In Iowa City, about 30 minutes into their set the intoxicated Mr. James performed a center stage face plant. He was hospitalized and released a day later.

Madonna is back on the market, hide the teenage boys. After seven years of marriage a spokesperson announced that she is calling it quits on Guy Ritchie. The pair is currently negotiating the division of their combined $525 million. José says it’s easier to divide up stocks and bonds than adopted children.

Don Cornelius
, the former host of the TV show "Soul Train," was busted this week. After a neighbor reported a domestic dispute, police were called to his Hollywood Hills home. The 72-year-old producer was arrested on suspicion of felony domestic violence. He was released on $50,000 bail and ordered to appear in court next month.

We had a spectacular on-stage blooper this week on the MTV Latin American Music Awards. Fauxmosexual Katy Perry did a belly flop onto a giant oink multi-tier cake, but had underestimated the slipperiness of frosting. She proceeded to fall on her ass and face repeatedly and eventually crawled off stage on all fours. This all of course distracts from the question: Why is she on the Latin Music awards?

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